reveries - christianity

14. In the Garden

"My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death." (Mt. 26:38)

"Through the prism of my tears I have seen a suffering God. It is said of God that no one can behold his face and live. I have always thought this meant that no one can see his splendor and live. A friend said perhaps this meant that no one could see his sorrow and live. Or perhaps his sorrow is his splendor." (Nicholas Wolterstorff)

Did Judas see this face in the garden that night? Not only did he see it, he kissed it. But did he truly "see" it? That's a question that haunts me. How could Judas live, gazing into the face of one overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Perhaps Judas saw the splendor of God--sorrow--and he could not live. This, of course, doesn't justify Judas' actions.

I imagine that Peter, too, saw this sorrow when he caught Jesus' eye immediately after that cock crowed for the third time. Did Jesus wear a splendorous sorrow on his face then--the sorrow over this denial? It is true that Peter can no longer live as he has to this point. He dies, too. And in dying, lives.

I want to acquaint myself with the the triumphant God, but I fear the way of triumph--for of course it means sorrow, defeat, death. To know God, to see his face, is to acquaint myself with suffering, pain, and sorrow. The only way to God is through Jesus in the garden.

"the offense"

    When Christianity came into the world, it did not need to call attention (even though it did so) to the fact that it was contrary to human nature and human understanding, for the world discovered that easily enough. But now that we are on intimate terms with Christianity, we must awaken the collision. The possibility of offense must again be preached to life. Only the possibility of offense (the antidote to the apologists’ sleeping potion) is able to waken those who have fallen asleep, is able to break the spell so that Christianity is itself again.

    Woe to him, therefore, who preaches Christianity without the possibility of offense. Woe to the person who smoothly, flirtatiously, commendingly, convincingly preaches some soft, sweet something which is supposed to be Christianity! Woe to the person who makes miracles reasonable. Woe to the person who betrays and breaks the mystery of faith, distorts it into public wisdom, because he takes away the possibility of offense! Woe to the person who speaks of the mystery of the Atonement without detecting in it anything of the possibility of offense. Woe again to him who thinks God and Christianity are something for study and discussion. Woe to every unfaithful steward who sits down and writes false proofs, winning friends for themselves and for Christianity by writing off the possibility ofoffense. Oh, the learning and acumen tragically wasted. Oh, the time wasted in this enormous work of making Christianity so reasonable, and in trying to make it so relevant!

    Only when Christianity rises up again, powerful in the possibility of offense, only then will it need no artful defenders. The more skillful, the more articulate, the more excellent the defense, however, the more Christianity is disfigured, abolished, exhausted like an emasculated man. Christianity ought not to be defended, at least not on the world’s terms. It is we who should see whether we can justify urselves. It is we who must choose: either to be offended or to accept Christianity. Therefore, take away from Christianity the possibility of offense or take away from the forgiveness of sin the battle of an anguished conscience. Then lock the churches, the sooner the better, or turn them into places of amusement which stand open all day long!

Soren Kierkegaard